By way of introduction, let me display my many hats: I am a mother of three girls and two boys between almost-two and nine. I am a wife to my husband of eleven years. (Bless his heart.) I have been a nurse for almost as long. (Bless my heart.) I am an Orthodox matushka by virtue of my husband’s priesthood.
Actually, since we’re now at a Serbian church, technically the title is no longer matushka (which is Russian), but I can’t pronounce the Serbian title so “matushka” I stay. Concerning our Orthodoxy, my husband and I have been converts to the Orthodox church for over a decade. I will probably delve into my own journey in a future post. We’re currently serving a Serbian Orthodox mission. This is not as much of a problem as you might assume since, while we don’t speak Serbian, neither do 99% of the parishioners.
A final word to explain the title of this blog. When my oldest three children were very small (i.e.-three, two and infant), I complained to my spiritual father that I seemed to spend more time outside the church than inside: walking/nursing the baby, removing the loud/crying toddler(s), etc. He told me that I was “praying with my feet.” I have had many, many occasions to remember his words with gratitude. Sometimes the days are so busy dealing with one child-related crisis after another that I feel like I pray in snatches on the run. Then I remember that just as my church-to-narthex ratio has increased, this too shall pass. One day will my days seem empty with no feet pounding on the stairs, no toys to step on in the dark, no jelly-kisses from the baby, no terrible knock-knock jokes. One day I won’t be watching magic shows in the living room or setting up tents from the bunk beds. It won’t take 45 minutes to match 37 1/2 pairs of white socks in various sizes. I can go to church and stand in the choir by myself and not hear “I HAVE TO GO POTTY” stage whispered during one of the quiet bits. This will be the point at which I look across the church at the frazzled new mother with envy and turn to my oldest and say:
“When am I going to have grandchildren??”